AkatsukiDesigns

The sun was shining into a most glistening apartment bedroom through its large opaque windows, so Shou had something to wake up to. He watched the sun rise over the city before shuffling off to make himself a coffee, his favorite morning “dish”. Today his coffee was extra delicious, so he knew luck was ahead for him. He didn’t need to wake his bandmates because the sun had, seemingly, woken them too. Shou watched them rise from their beds with weary eyes and would laugh each time one began to yawn. Shou was, as he assumed, the only one fully awake.

Not far down the street from their apartment, a nervous Makoto stood before his mirror and posed amateurishly, deciding what to wear that day. He tightened the top of his tie around his neck by tugging the bottom and brushed the stray strands of hair from his face. He wasn’t used to the spotlight, and more so, the girls. His band, DOREMIdan, was scheduled to play in a huge venue later in the afternoon and Makoto had found that every single ticket was sold out. He didn’t know what his fans would think if he came dressed in rags, so he truly tried his best to look good. His attempt was working, however Makoto didn’t feel like himself at all.

Yet again, in another atmosphere completely, the guys of Dir en Grey were warming up for a show. They made it seem as though this action was actually necessary. Kyo was screaming to his heart’s content, Toshiya practically started an earthquake with his bass, Shinya beat the drums excitedly,  and Die and Kaoru had synchronized their guitars. The noise blasting through every speaker kept the musicians confident. Each dressed in their own visual style began to fall into the music and the lyrics their vocalist screamed wholeheartedly. Everything was perfect.

What was similar about these bands along with many others? They all booked reservations for the same restaurant for later that evening. This was, most of the time, an impossible thing to do. However, by fate, the guys had managed. It was fate that said they would meet. And it was fate that led them to this encounter.

--

“Breathe, Makoto,” drummer, Reika said as he watched his bandmate suffer.

By the look on his face, the entire band could tell that their vocalist was nervous, and he had much reason to be! By fact, he was the center of the attention of most of his screaming fans and he was about to stand before a microphone at the center of the stage. The entire band showed much sympathy for him and gave him a comforting rub on his shoulder before climbing onto the stage. Reika nodded to him one last time and Makoto was ready.

One word was all it took to calm the uneasy vocalist.

It was quick and simple, but the word proved him to be ready and from that Makoto began to sing. Every song he sang got better and better by each moment that passed by, and eventually the show was over. Any weight on the shoulders of that vocalist was completely lifted. However, the luck of one other vocalist wasn’t so glamorous.

--

For a different vocalist who was used to the situation by now, everything was progressing swiftly and easily.

Kyo began to screech out parts of “Beautiful Dirt” as the rest of Dir en Grey played in unison. His voice sounded amazing as the words escaped from his mouth, though his voice was the worst of his problems. As he screamed out the final line of the song, he fell to the stage floor, shaking. He pulled himself into the fetal position there and refused to stand again. A few stagehands and security had to lug him off the stage. His health was horrible, as anyone could tell. The show was cut short and the rest of the band took Kyo out for a special treat.

I know for a fact that there are times when you feel like you want to lock yourself in a room and never come out. That feeling doesn’t come often but when it does it never wants to let go. Just like any other day for me, this is one of those moments.

I don’t ride subways. Ever. They terrify me beyond belief. But here I stand, about to board one of those dark and suspicious railcars. I know that sometimes I’m over exaggerating my fear, and that I’m stupid for believing some of the things I’m told about this form of transportation. To me, a train underground is worse than a train in the sky. Even if no railing held beneath it, I’d still be better off in one of those sky trains. Maybe if I had someone at my side, I wouldn’t be so scared. But I am, and always have been, alone.

When the subway arrived, it arrived at top speed, and I almost thought and hoped that it’d zoom right past me. A chill went down my spine when it screeched to a stop, but I held in my fear. It was because my parents left me for another life that I stood there. I had to go back to school again, this time without a caring mother to wake me in the morning or feed me or pack my lunch before I trudged off to the hell they called school. The friends I’d had in grade school were also gone, all to separate schools. And now I was fifteen, parentless, and on my way to high school. A new school.

My backpack was heavy with all the new supplies I needed and a few things I’d stuffed inside just because. The weight of the bag didn’t help the weight in my chest as I stepped into the crowded subway, but I did it just the same. I was pushed to the side a few times and got yelled at once or twice, but I finally squirmed in through the massive crowd. Once inside I had to stand, raising my anxiety level by hundreds. The sooner I got off this dreaded bus, the better. I closed my eyes and waited, doing my best to avoid vomiting.

Within minutes, the subway stopped and I was able to get off. I watched a few others step off the bus, all looking my age, but none in the same uniform. So far, I was alone. I checked my cell phone for the time, noticing that it was 7:35. If I didn’t hurry, I’d be late to school. It was a typical first day for me, despite the fact that it was a Saturday. Now that I lived so far from the school, I wouldn’t be the first one there.

When I caught sight of a metal fence I knew I was getting close to the school. I’d seen the school before but never actually gone inside. The weight in my chest started to disappear as I approached the school, my backpack slung over my aching shoulder. I glanced up at the stairs in front of me, the ones that would lead me in. A few students nodded to me, so I guessed they approved of my presence. I stepped forward and was pulled into the crowd by strangely strong hands. Either I would make friends or I’d be slapped. I wasn’t sure which I preferred.

The owner of the hands that had gripped so tightly to my wrists was a tall, pleasant-looking sophmore. His eyes were blank of emotions, but he smiled warmly to me as I attempted to catch my balance.

“Don’t fall!” he joked, but grabbed my shoulder to stable me. Once I was standing, he introduced himself. “Sakamoto Takashi desu!”

I nodded quickly to him and replied with my own name, “Ogata Hiroto desu.”

“Hiroto-kun” he repeated, “You don’t mind if I call you that, right?”

I nodded once more in reply and he smiled back. After he’d finished introducing himself, things really took off.

“Hiroto-kun, I’m Toshimasa Hara, but you can call me Hara-kun or Toshiya if you’d like!”

I waved shyly to him and the entire group burst into laughter.

The first to introduce himself turned to me, a bit closer than he was a moment ago and said, “By the way…I’ve adjusted most to being called Saga, so please call me that, if you don’t mind.”

“Hai!”

I looked to my right to find an even taller student, with long, black hair and he smiled warmly to me. The sick feeling in my stomach was gone by now. I was making friends.

“Terachi Shinya, or just Shinya. Whatever you prefer.”

Just as he’d finished his sentence, a bell rang loudly over the grounds and we all rushed into the hallways of the school. Everyone steered different directions in the long narrow hallway, but Saga stayed at my side.

“Need help finding your locker?” he asked, grinning sheepishly.

“Haiii, please!” I replied as he led me along.

With his help, I was able to find my locker easily, but when he trudged off to his own class, I found myself alone again. I wasn’t sure where any of my classes were at all, but some of the teachers looked friendly enough to ask. I shoved what I didn’t need into my locker before heading up a stairway to my first class. I took that this class was on the second floor. Once there, I approached a student who was totally anonymous to me and tapped his shoulder.

He jumped slightly as though he’d been caught off guard, but faced me with a smile afterwards.

“What are you looking for,” he asked.

“213.”

“Emiruuuuuuu,” he called behind him, “Do you know where 213 is?”

This boy called Emiru shuffled over to us and grabbed my paper.

“Nando~!” he said, pointing to the end of the hallway.

I followed his directions and began to walk towards the classroom. When I was halfway there, a voice called out to me. I turned and found an out of breath senior not far behind me.

“Hey!! No YELLING in the HALLWAYS!” a teacher called before he could speak.

Once the senior had caught his breath, he glanced over his shoulder then began to talk. “Since your new, and I don’t know when I’ll see you next, I thought I should tell you it was nice meeting you.”

“Same to you,” I breathed.

“I’m Murai Naoyuki. For future reference, ya know…”

His smile was contagious and I couldn’t help but smile back. I gave him my name just as he’d given his and waved goodbye to him when a second bell rang.

I never thought I’d get into my first class, let alone find it. When I did find my class, I couldn’t wait to get out. Our sensei made us introduce ourselves in front of the entire class. I just felt somewhat relieved that I’d only have to do that once. I found a seat in the back of the room, just in case my mind ever wandered off and I didn’t want to be scolded. Besides that, I felt safe in the back of the room, where I wouldn’t have to feel stares at the back of my neck.

The first class ended, as did the second and the third, rather quietly. I was off to gym class, which was right before lunch. I felt really dumb in cleats and high socks during gym, but it was required unless you wanted to be kicked out of gym. Everyone laughed at each other and it was all good fun until class had to start. Luckily in this class, we weren’t assigned to a seat and we didn’t have to introduce ourselves. It was, by far, my favorite class. We played a sport called badminton, one which I’d never heard of in my life. A classmate of mine said it was an English sport. It reminded me of tennis, but the two differed a bit.

At the end of class, I had a shower. It felt so good to be clean again before lunch. I put everything back in my locker and headed for lunch. I was stopped on my way by the Naoyuki kid I’d seen earlier. He looked joyful as though he was about to have his first meal in a year.

He placed his hands on the back of his neck and sighed. “Luuuuunch.”

“Your long lost love?” I asked jokingly, throwing my bag over my shoulder.

“It is the most important part of the school day, you know…and hey, it’s Saturday! That means, we get to leave school right after lunch!”

“Really?” I asked.

“Yep,” he said, pausing for a moment before speaking again. “Hey…Would you like to come over to my house after school?”

I said nothing.

“I understand if your parents are strict…” he said. “Maybe some other day?”

I nodded. “N-no! Of course I can come over!”

His eyes lit up at my reply. He then grabbed my arm and pulled me swiftly into the cafeteria.